| Have you ever known someone (or does it | | | | people suffering. Take your attention off |
| describe you?) who seems to believe that they | | | | yourself and pay attention to others, at |
| suffer more than any others have ever | | | | least occasionally, and especially when you |
| suffered...to the point where it becomes | | | | feel sorriest for yourself. |
| their identity? There is an element of, "My | | | | |
| suffering has been greater than yours...or | | | | 3. Get out of the rut of negative thinking. |
| anyone else's!" They actually seem to have an | | | | Negative thinking is a guaranteed downward |
| aggressive attitude with their suffering, as | | | | spiral into depression. It's all a matter of |
| if there is a suffering competition and they | | | | self talk. Stop telling yourself "stories" |
| are the obvious winner. Perhaps it is part of | | | | about everything being bleak and black. Start |
| the human condition to be somewhat | | | | telling yourself about all your good luck and |
| narcissistic with our suffering. | | | | the wonderful things in your life. |
| Unfortunately, what frequently happens when | | | | |
| we are in the midst of a "pity party" is that | | | | 4. Consciously choose to control your |
| we totally discount the suffering of any | | | | feelings. Turn off the news and turn on |
| other beings on the earth. | | | | inspirational music or motivational tapes or |
| | | | CD's. Read positive and affirming books and |
| Think a bit about what could be the | | | | magazines. Watch inspirational or educational |
| psychology behind wanting to win the | | | | and awe inspiring DVD's. |
| "Suffering Competition". It could mean that | | | | |
| you neither have nor feel compassion for | | | | 5. Take action. Assess your situation. |
| others. It probably means that you need to | | | | Research and explore which actions you could |
| triumph as the "top of the heap" of | | | | take to improve your circumstances...then |
| suffering. It likely means that you discount | | | | take action. |
| the suffering of others and think only your | | | | |
| suffering counts. | | | | 6. When all else fails, clean, clear and |
| | | | organize. Get rid of everything that is junk |
| If you are a person who is the King or Queen | | | | in your life. Keep a notebook nearby and jot |
| of Suffering and want to give up your crown, | | | | down any ideas you get during clearing. Take |
| what are some steps you can take? | | | | things to your favorite charity, throw junk |
| | | | in the trash, and recycle what you can. All |
| 1. Focus on gratitude. Start to be thankful | | | | this old stuff "holds" stuck energy. This is |
| for every good thing in your life. Be | | | | one of the best ways to start the energy |
| thankful if you're warm and inside during | | | | flowing. |
| terrible weather. Be thankful if the sky is | | | | |
| blue. Be thankful if you have soap to clean | | | | 7. Initiate a spiritual practice. Begin to |
| your dishes and clothing. Be thankful that | | | | meditate. Pray often. Think about the |
| you can eat when you are hungry. Be thankful | | | | positive changes you want to bring to the |
| that you can pray and meditate and calm | | | | world. Consider how you can uplift others. |
| yourself. Be thankful if you have work and | | | | |
| income. Be thankful when you have | | | | If you want to give up your position as the |
| transportation. Be thankful for your mate and | | | | King or Queen of Suffering, it takes some |
| your family and friends. Be thankful for a | | | | conscious effort. You CAN choose to lose the |
| warm bed at night. Show appreciation for all | | | | Suffering Competition. With concerted effort, |
| you have. | | | | you will no longer win, place or show where |
| | | | suffering is concerned. With Herculean |
| 2. Start to notice and feel and show | | | | effort, you could actually start living with |
| compassion for the challenges you see other | | | | joy. |