| As birth moved out of the home, and
| |
| | noticed she was upset and talked with her
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| families were splintered by the birth
| |
| | about her fear, got the mother to smile,
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| experience, birth no longer was a family
| |
| | and the little girl joined her family for
|
| event. Birth became dehumanized. With the
| |
| | the birth. 8 The Thompson family had a
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| return to home and with the consumer
| |
| | number of children born at home and all
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| demands for more "home-like" settings in
| |
| | of them remember the events as being very
|
| institutions, the concept of children at
| |
| | exciting and filled with joy. The husband
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| birth has became a "problem" that needs
| |
| | of one of the daughters comments, "At one
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| special preparation, classes and advice
| |
| | time, I believed having a baby was just
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| from "experts". I have a very strong
| |
| | the same as having your appendix removed.
|
| prejudice regarding children's presence
| |
| | It always seemed like it was a matter of
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| at birth -- if the mother and father want
| |
| | life and death..." After the homebirth of
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| their children present at the birth and
| |
| | his niece, whom he saw within 5 minutes
|
| if the children want to be there, then
| |
| | of her birth, he said, "I can't believe
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| that is how that family should have their
| |
| | that something so complex could be so
|
| birth. This is their family. To quote
| |
| | simple and beautiful." Although he was an
|
| Marjie Hathaway, the family is "a
| |
| | adult, his impression expresses what so
|
| necessary and holy institution." A
| |
| | many children feel but are unable to
|
| midwife's job is to support and empower
| |
| | articulate. 9 Sue Hathaway, 15, spoke at
|
| families. 1, 2Why should children be
| |
| | a NAPSAC conference about her experience
|
| present?*bonding *positive sex education
| |
| | watchilng her youngest sibling be born.
|
| *an appreciation of fear and pain *to
| |
| | Her concluding comment was "If you are
|
| witness a miracle *be helpful and
| |
| | not going to learn from your parents
|
| encouraging *be a part of the whole
| |
| | about having babies, who is going to
|
| family *maybe diminish sibling jealosy
| |
| | teach you?" Jonathan Stewart also spoke
|
| Why should children not be present?
| |
| | at that NAPSAC conference. His
|
| *negative feelings about sex, birth *fear
| |
| | recollections of the births of his 4
|
| of the unknown *lost modesty for mother
| |
| | siblings were of wonder, "pleasant
|
| *shock at seeing "forbidden body parts"
| |
| | memories", and he remembers very little
|
| *pain might frighten child *potential for
| |
| | blood. Younger brother Keith, upon seeing
|
| nightmares 3, 4How some parents
| |
| | his newest brother just be born, blurted
|
| decideSome families are very comfortable
| |
| | out, "Look, Mom, he is naked."
|
| being with their children in various
| |
| | Ten-year-old Lora in remembering the her
|
| stages of dress or undress, occasionally
| |
| | brother's birth says "I felt love in my
|
| share their bed with a child and are
| |
| | heart. . . I felt close to him." 10
|
| easily able to discuss any topic that
| |
| | Shiela Kitzinger interviewed a couple of
|
| arises with their children. Other
| |
| | women whose older child slept until the
|
| families are very modest and avoid
| |
| | baby was just born and then awaoke and
|
| discussions about body parts or sex.
| |
| | joined the family on the birth bed. Said
|
| There is no right way, but for a family
| |
| | one, "Julie woke up to find a sister had
|
| contemplating a birth with children
| |
| | been born during the night just as we had
|
| present, a certain amount of information
| |
| | told her it would happen. We were the
|
| will need to be shared. In a family that
| |
| | happiest little family in the world." 11
|
| is extremely modest, the parents need to
| |
| | Sandra Anderson had her son Josiah in a
|
| discuss their level of comfort with
| |
| | hospital with many interventions. When
|
| having their children see the mother
| |
| | she became pregnant with her second
|
| somewhat naked. If mother is not
| |
| | child, she was determined to have a
|
| comfortable with this idea, then it may
| |
| | natural birth and to include Josiah in
|
| be better to plan for the children to be
| |
| | this very family-centered event. He was 2
|
| there but not in the room where the birth
| |
| | 1/2 years old. Her perspective of his
|
| will be taking place. Of course, other
| |
| | experience was that he was comfortable
|
| concerns such as passing involuntary
| |
| | with the whole situation. An added
|
| feces, amniotic fluid and blood may be
| |
| | benefit for her, was that he reminded her
|
| embarrassing to some mothers (or fathers)
| |
| | that she would not be in labor forever,
|
| who would prefer to not have their older
| |
| | as he asked, "Where are my tinkertoys"
|
| children present. Sometimes women make
| |
| | and "I want a peanut butter sandwich."
|
| noises while they labor and push. A
| |
| | She felt Josiah added a "wonderful spirit
|
| mother must be sure that she is
| |
| | of spontaneity to the birth." 12 Children
|
| comfortable making those necessary sounds
| |
| | have a different perspective on birth and
|
| with her children present. At some point
| |
| | do not necessarily "see" it as adults do.
|
| during the birth, their mother will be
| |
| | One woman remembered how after the birth
|
| unclothed in order to birth the baby and
| |
| | of her fifth child, her fou-year-old came
|
| nurse the newborn. If the children will
| |
| | into the room and noticed the furniture
|
| be able to witness the birth, they need
| |
| | had been rearranged. This so interested
|
| to know where the baby is going to come
| |
| | her that she went and got her other
|
| out and a little bit about how the
| |
| | siblings to see the room. One family felt
|
| process works. How detailed these
| |
| | that having the children included from
|
| explanations become will depend on the
| |
| | the start of the pregnancy through the
|
| age and curiousity of the child or
| |
| | birth was very important and wrote, "The
|
| children.Parent preparationProbably the
| |
| | midwife asked us every day how the baby
|
| best preparation is good communication
| |
| | was, and the children delighted in
|
| between parents. For parents who feel
| |
| | telling her all that had happened since
|
| they need more knowledge, a consumer
| |
| | her last visit. These may appear to be
|
| oriented childbirth course may be time
| |
| | trivial details. But when I read of the
|
| well-spent. Many of these courses include
| |
| | break-up of families perhaps they are not
|
| discussions of children at birth. Some
| |
| | so trivial, but vitally important factors
|
| even have a class devoted to the
| |
| | instead." 11StudiesA number of studies
|
| siblings, to help the parents prepare
| |
| | have been conducted over the years
|
| them for their new brother or sister.
| |
| | looking at various aspects of birth and
|
| Those who are planning to have an
| |
| | the effect on children and families. A
|
| unmedicated, natural birth need to take
| |
| | few studies have found that one of the
|
| good care of themselves. Good nutrition
| |
| | reasons parents choose a home birth is
|
| is the cornerstone of a healthy pregnancy
| |
| | specifically for the opportunity for all
|
| and goes hand in hand with a lifestyle
| |
| | family members to have a positive
|
| that includes adequate exercise and
| |
| | experience. Lewis Mehl noted that the
|
| avoids smoking, alcohol and drugs. A
| |
| | children he studied had accurate
|
| healthy woman stands a very good chance
| |
| | information about birth and saw the event
|
| of giving birth to a healthy baby. The
| |
| | as a good experience. Another researcher,
|
| place of birth must be agreeable to the
| |
| | Chase, found that mothers noted less
|
| mother and hopefully the father, too. 6
| |
| | sibling rivalry between sibllings who
|
| AdvantagesThere are numerous positive
| |
| | were present at the birth. Curry comments
|
| aspects to having children present at
| |
| | that children blame the new baby when
|
| their sibling's birth. The family is
| |
| | mother disappears to go to the hospital,
|
| together for a family event, they feel a
| |
| | but when children are included in the
|
| part of it. Psychologically, they are not
| |
| | birth, they see the new baby as a "gift."
|
| locked out of a family experience. Home
| |
| | When children were allowed at births,
|
| birth helps with this regard also because
| |
| | their view of birth became a real
|
| mother and baby are always there, whereas
| |
| | experience and not the mysterous, scarey,
|
| if mom disappears and shows up days later
| |
| | life-or-death event portrayed in the
|
| with the baby, the children left behind
| |
| | media. They were not separated from their
|
| may feel they were abandoned and are
| |
| | mother or father and so by-passed the
|
| jealous of the new baby. 2, 8ProblemsWith
| |
| | separation anxiety that many children
|
| younger children, fear is often an issue
| |
| | suffer when their siblings are born in a
|
| that arises, especially if the mother is
| |
| | hospital that does not permit their
|
| making noises, working hard, or has her
| |
| | presence. It is felt that the presence of
|
| face grimaced in pain. Having someone at
| |
| | children at birth also affects how well
|
| the birth whose sole function is to take
| |
| | the siblings bond, sinimlar to the
|
| care of the children can ease this
| |
| | mother-infant bonding that occurs
|
| problem. Sometimes little children become
| |
| | immediately after birth. 2 While not a
|
| bored by the labor and that person can
| |
| | truly scientific study, Dr. Michelle
|
| take them for a walk or play with them. 8
| |
| | Harrison's informal study of children
|
| Child preparation 1) discuss with
| |
| | over a two hour time during which they
|
| children what will happen a) pregnancy,
| |
| | were actively speaking about birth and
|
| labor and birth b) read books about birth
| |
| | related issues, makes a couple of points.
|
| c) watch birth videos d) answer questions
| |
| | She notes that the conversations about
|
| in an age-appropriate way 2) keep
| |
| | birth seemed so serious, where as when
|
| conversations about birth positive 3)
| |
| | the children were discussing animal
|
| take children with you to prenatals so
| |
| | births, they were livlier. Her
|
| they become familiar with your birth
| |
| | interpretation includes the insight that
|
| attendant and some of the routines (BP,
| |
| | they may perceive talk about birth as
|
| pulse, palpation, etc.) 4) give each
| |
| | being more for adults. Some children did
|
| child a job to do during labor or birth
| |
| | talk about bad outcomes and Dr. Harrison
|
| or after a) give massage b) get drinks
| |
| | writes that this affirms the idea that
|
| for mom c) make meals d) cut cord e)
| |
| | birthing babies is serious business. One
|
| dress baby, etc. 5) have caretaker
| |
| | topic that was somewhat surprising was a
|
| present for children who need someone 6)
| |
| | discussion about talking about birth at
|
| have a party for new baby after the birth
| |
| | school. They tended to feel that it was
|
| for siblings 4, 7
| |
| | not ok to talk about their birth
|
| Guidelines for Children at
| |
| | experience at school or with with their
|
| Birth*children must be able to come and
| |
| | teachers or peers because the experience
|
| go as they need *caregiver will take care
| |
| | was not a familiar one.4 1
|
| of smaller chilren's needs *children will
| |
| | Hathaway, Marjie and Jay, Children at
|
| stay in their own home either before,
| |
| | Birth, 1978, page 1. 2. NAPSAC, Chapter
|
| during or after the birth *only a
| |
| | 68, pages 877-895. 3. Hathaway, pages
|
| familiar person will wake up a young
| |
| | 11-21. 4. NAPSAC, Chapter 67, pages
|
| sleeping child *reassure children that
| |
| | 869-876. 5. Hathaway, pages 31-34. 6.
|
| everything is alright *let the children
| |
| | Hathaway, pages 41-58. 7. Hathaway, pages
|
| get to know each other in both planned
| |
| | 105-106. 8. Hathaway, pages 131-174. 9.
|
| (give a gift) and unplanned ways
| |
| | Thompson Family, 21st Century Obstetrics
|
| 2ExperiencesFamily after family
| |
| | Now!, Vol. 1, Chapter 18, pages 239-253.
|
| documented their births with older
| |
| | 10. NAPSAC, 21ST Century Obstetrics Now!,
|
| siblings present in Children at Birth.
| |
| | Vol 3, Chapter 65, pages 857-863. 11.
|
| Nearly all the children who were
| |
| | Kitzinger, Sheila, Birth at Home, 1981,
|
| interviewed were very pleased to have
| |
| | pages101-111. 12. NAPSAC, Chapter 66,
|
| been at the birth and were not frightened
| |
| | pages 865-867.Yvonne Cryns has degrees in
|
| by the actual birth. One story near the
| |
| | nursing and law. She is the co-founder of
|
| end highlighted the reason a caregiver is
| |
| | Nursing Programs - Midwives.net -
|
| needed for the children. This little girl
| |
| | Yvonne also produced a video about
|
| was firghtened by the mother's efforts to
| |
| | midwives:
|
| pucsh the baby out and left the room,
| |
| | Yvonne is a nationally-credentialed
|
| refusing to re-enter. Then someone
| |
| | CPM, a professional homebirth midwife.
|
